Of all the struggles a single girl must face, most people wouldn’t think that finding a church would be one of them. However, when you take into consideration the fact that most churches are completely comprised of young families and older couples, it can start to feel like a quest for a Mommy and Me group rather than a place to worship.
I started filtering out churches based on the timing of their women’s bible studies. Many were held in the middle of the day when no single woman with any semblance of a career could attend. From there I tried out a few churches and most of their services centered around the family and coping with struggles in a marriage—not exactly something a 20 something girl without even a glimpse of marriage on the horizon can relate to. Thankfully I came across this points system to assist me in my search.
It’s not that the sole reason I attend a church is to be validated in my current life situation, but it would be nice to find someplace that can offer me some sort of spiritual guidance without subtly indicating that I went wrong somewhere along the way because I haven’t hitched myself to a nice man on the straight and narrow and started producing little miracles. Also, the spiritual needs of a single person are different from those in a family and it is necessary that a church be equipped to meet those needs just as readily as it meets the needs of its married parishioners.
I was grateful when I found the Urban Refuge. From the moment I walked in the doors I was thrilled with the atmosphere. The congregation was a mix of people from all walks of life including singles and families. I was greeted by an individual in the church who made sure that I felt welcome (but not in a creepy, cult-like kind of way, you know what I’m talking about). The sermons have been about improving our relationships with everyone in our lives as well as our relationships with God rather than our marriage relationships. I’ve only attended a couple times, but I think this church has found the balance that many haven’t even bothered to reach for.